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Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
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January 28, 2022Hello, It’s Me, the Guy Who Gets Visibly Angry at an Image of Minnie Mouse in a Pantsuit
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January 12, 2022Ho There! I Am a Nineteenth-Century Iron Worker and I Await the Day This Factory Is Refurbished into an Up-Market Food Hall
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January 4, 2022I’m HBO Max, and Oh My God, What Is It Now?
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November 17, 2021I’m Captain Ahab and I Say We Must Never Transition Away from a Whale-Based Energy Industry
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November 9, 2021I Am Godzilla, King of Monsters, and I, Too, Had a Brief Relationship with Pete Davidson
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November 3, 2021It Is I, William Shakespeare, and I Am Begging You to Stop Letting High Schoolers Put on Productions of Macbeth
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November 1, 2021An Afternoon with Me, the Man in an REI Print Ad
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October 20, 2021It Would Be Un-American to Support Legislation That Doesn’t Directly Benefit Me
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October 15, 2021Scooby-Doo Refuses to Get the Rabies Vaccine
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September 13, 2021Miss Trunchbull Asks That You Reconsider Her Methods, Post-Pandemic
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August 13, 2021I’m the Old Lady from Titanic and Let Me Just Tell You Those Nudes Will Leak
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August 12, 2021Oedipus Learns of the Term “Oedipus Complex”
Trending 🔥
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November 22, 2023Post-Dinner Interview with a Twelve-Year-Old Who Sat at the Grown-Ups’ Table for the First Time on Thanksgiving
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November 14, 2023In the Office Auto-Reply Emails for a Hybrid Work Schedule
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February 23, 2012Lines from The Princess Bride That Double as Comments on Freshman Composition Papers
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September 2, 2021Oh My Fucking God, Get the Fucking Vaccine Already, You Fucking Fucks
Recently
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December 2, 2023“Just Say the Word, and I’ll Bring My Whole Heart to Anything”: Remembering Gabe Hudson
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December 1, 2023A Message from the Chancellor on the Recent Student Protest
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December 1, 2023We Can’t Wait to Be Part of Your Neighborhood, but First We Need to Dig This Massive Hole
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November 30, 2023A Garnet Hill Lady Does MDMA