ILLUSTORIA MAGAZINE
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Articles by
Holly Theisen-Jones
Holly is a writer, counselor, and nature enthusiast based in Atlanta, Georgia. Her book, “The Green Dumb Guide to Houseplants”: https://lnk.to/greendumbguide, is available soon from Chronicle Books.
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September 5, 2023Sleep Tips for New Parents from the Sleep Paralysis Demon
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May 16, 2023The Pros and Cons of Diets I Have Tried
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April 20, 2023Are You Pregnant or Just High?
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March 16, 2023I Misplaced My Phone for Forty-Five Minutes, and Now I’m a Mindfulness Expert
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February 18, 2020What Your Dog’s Breed Says About You, Part 2
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January 30, 2018When Life Gives You Lemons
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December 19, 2017Formerly Forbidden Christmas Dinner Conversation Topics I Now Welcome in 2017
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September 5, 2017Whine and Cheese Pairings
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August 17, 2017I Regret Decluttering My Home So Shortly Before the Zombie Apocalypse
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June 20, 2017Wellness Blog Homepage Mad Libs
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May 1, 2017What Your Dog’s Breed Says About You
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March 27, 2017My Fully Optimized Life Allows Me Ample Time to Optimize Yours
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November 22, 2023Post-Dinner Interview with a Twelve-Year-Old Who Sat at the Grown-Ups’ Table for the First Time on Thanksgiving
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November 29, 2023Your 2023 WebMD Wrapped
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February 23, 2012Lines from The Princess Bride That Double as Comments on Freshman Composition Papers
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November 28, 2023Please Buy Tesla’s Cybertruck, Which Is Cool, Not Stupid
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December 5, 2023My Life Before and After Turning Twenty-Six and Losing My Parents’ Health Insurance
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December 5, 2023What It Means When a Woman Says She Is “Sex Positive,” According to Brian from Hinge
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December 4, 2023I’m a Holiday Gift Guide Writer, and I Really Need You Pricks to Start Playing Backgammon
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December 4, 2023Bitchslap: A Column About Women and Fighting: Fun Train to Fightville